50 Fun Things to Do During a Boring Lecture
- Bring a blow horn. Use it when you ask or answer a
question.
- Heckle the professor.
- Hire a video crew to come to the class. If asked about
it, say that you have to tape the lecture for a friend.
- Bring a water gun. Shoot the professor when his back is
turned.
- Get the other students in your row to do the wave.
- Bring a small chalkboard to class. Ask the professor if
you can borrow his chalk to take notes.
- Contradict everything the professor says. Offer
irrefutable scientific proof.
- If it's a math lecture, claim that the professor
misspelled pi.
- When the professor asks a question, raise your hand. If
the professor calls on you, point to someone in the next
row and say "He knows." Pick a different person
each time.
- Buy a doll. When you go to class, leave the doll in your
chair, along with your notebook and pen. Say that you
have an important meeting to go to, and that the doll
will be taking notes for you.
- Bring a typewriter. Use it to take notes.
- Write a love note. Sign it "a secret admirer."
Get someone to pass it to the professor.
- Get up to go to the bathroom five or six times during the
class. Change clothes every time.
- While taking notes, write vulgar words every few lines.
If anyone asks, say you have Tourette's syndrome.
- Buy a watermelon. Give it to the professor. If he/she
asks, say "They were out of apples."
- Bring a small tape player. Play a tape of the previous
lecture. Take notes on both.
- If it's an English class, ask how the theory of
relativity relates to Shakespeare's "Midsummer
Night's Dream."
- Pretend to be asleep until five minutes before the end of
class. Then wake up and explain that you missed the
lecture, and ask the professor to summarize what he/she
talked about.
- Bring a can of spray paint. Use it to take notes on the
classroom wall.
- Bring a fully-stocked picnic basket to class. Explain
that you didn't have time to eat breakfast.
- Wear a loincloth to class. If anyone asks, say that it is
your costume for the school play, and you didn't have
time to change out of it.
- Tear out pages of the textbook and make little origami
animals out of them. Have a whole menagerie by the end of
class. Give them to the professor as a token of your
esteem.
- Bring a fishing rod. Try to catch things on the
professor's desk.
- Bring a tape player and a tape of a thunderstorm. Keep it
hidden. Sometime during the lecture, start the tape,
stand up, claim that the professor has angered the gods
and leave. Watch to see how many students follow you
after the tape starts playing.
- Make reserved seating cards and place them on the desks
before class.
- Tell the professor you are on a new experimental cold
medication that may have strange side effects. Every ten
minutes or so, run around the room screaming. Afterward,
claim that you have no memory of what just happened.
- Claim that you are the new student teacher, and that you
are to give the lecture for that class. If the professor
agrees, lecture on a subject completely opposite to the
subject of the class. If the professor objects, say that
the students should have a wide range of knowledge.
- Switch the professor's lecture notes with your history
notes from last term.
- Raise your hand and ask when the movie is going to start.
- Bring a flash camera. Take pictures every few minutes,
using a very bright flash. If anyone complains, say that
you didn't see any sign saying you couldn't bring
cameras.
- Bring a light bulb. Hold it over your head whenever you
have the answer to a question.
- Bring an easel and a paint set. Paint a portrait of the
professor during the lecture. Say that it is a homework
assignment for art class.
- Sneeze very loudly. Then, have the person next to you
sneeze, then the person next to him, and so on. See how
long it takes before the professor sneezes.
- When the professor comes in, say, very loudly, "Hey!
A substitute! All right!" Claim that the real
professor said you could have lecture outside.
- Come to class wearing the same outfit as the professor.
Call the professor a copycat.
- If it's a geology lecture, switch the quartz crystals
with New Folger's Crystals and see if the professor
notices. Have a hidden camera.
- Hide a ticking clock under the podium. Call in a bomb
threat.
- Write your assignment on Plato on your little sister's
modeling clay.
- Ask questions in a foreign language you know the
professor doesn't know. Act angry when he/she doesn't
understand you.
- Come to class dressed as a professional wrestler. Tell
people you joined the wrestling team. Bodyslam anyone who
doesn't believe you.
- When the professor comes in, suddenly scream,
"NOOOOOO! Not him! Not Professor Johnson!! They let
him teach again! Noooooooooo!" then run out of them
room. See how many people follow you.
- Turn your row into a mosh pit.
- Before class starts, turn all the desks upside down. Sit
on them like you would normally.
- Two words: American Gladiators.
- Make requests like people do at rock concerts.
("Relativity! Relativity! Einstein rocks!")
- Bring popcorn. Throw it and the professor. Complain that
these trained animal shows aren't what they used to be.
- Bring a tape player and a tape of the school bell. Play
it every 15 minutes.
- When the professor calls on you, mumble incomprehensibly.
Answer every question in this fashion. See how long it
takes before the professor stops calling on you.
- When you take a test, hire a security guard to stand by
your desk and make sure no one cheats off your paper.
- Make up a strange religious cult and distribute flyers
for it during class. If it is a religious studies class,
complain that your cult was not included in the textbook,
and demand that they get a new one.