The First Realizations That You're Not In College Anymore
- You're waking up at 6 am instead of going to bed.
- Beers at lunch get you reprimanded.
- College sweatshirts are 'casual' instead of dress up.
- Your parents charge rent.
- Your parents walk in on you having sex, not your
roommate.
- The four food groups are no longer beer, pizza, ramen and
cereal.
- It's 'getting late' when it's 11:00 p.m.
- Three words: School Loan Payments.
- You make thousands of dollars a year - and still can't
afford that dream Porsche.
- You start eyeing the Light Beer Section appreciatively.
Pickup football games mean that at least one person will
be in the hospital by game's end.
- THEN, discussing with your friends: GPA's, phone rates
and tonsil hockey; NOW: IRA's, Interest rates and their
kid's orthodontia.
- Sleeping on the couch is a no-no.
- Naps are no longer available between noon and 6 p.m.
- Sneakers are now 'weekend shoes'.
- Dinner and a movie - The whole date instead of the
beginning of one.
- Your girlfriend being pregnant brings thought of tax
deductions instead of coronaries.
- Jack and Cokes become Dewers on the Rocks.
- The only drugs you take are Tums and Tylenol.
- The weak single you hit in the intramural softball game
is now remembered as a Varsity dinger for the League
Championship.
- You get your news from sources other than USA Today,
ESPN, Sportscenter and MTV News.
- Random hook-ups are no longer acceptable.
- You wear more ties/skirts in a week than you even owned
while taking classes.
- You find yourself reminiscing fondly of 2-hour Calculus
exams.
- You empathize with the characters from "Friends."
- METABOLISM SLOWDOWN
- Football "season tickets" go FROM $75 for the
season with dozens of friends to $750 for the season with
the three other guys who want to get away from the
family.
- Wine appreciation expands beyond Boone's and Mad Dog.
- You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.
- Grocery lists actually contain relatively healthy food.
- When drinking, you say at least once per night, 'I just
can't put it down the same as I used to'.
- You are the only person over the age of 16 in your
neighborhood with a Sega.