Why Graduate Students are Like Cats
- They are your friends if you feed them.
- They talk to you and you can't understand what they are saying.
- They tend to run amok in the apartment/house for no apparent reason in short bursts of frenzy, followed by dormancy.
- They can survive with a minimum of attention, but do like to be noticed and praised every so often.
- They are creatures of the night.
- They follow instructions if they feel like it.
- They can be soft and cuddly when they feel like it.
- Cats barf hairballs, grad students barf highballs (and any other drink they can consume to excess).
- Food is very important to them.
- Sleep is also very important to them.
- Both can sleep or otherwise ignore you while you are talking to them.
- Both hide when something big and noisy (vacuum cleaner or supervisor) comes into their vicinity.
- They eat some of the most disgusting things (free food).
- They can sleep just about anywhere.
- They have their own set of morals.
- They both like using the computer (cats for warmth).
- They both could care less about (insert anything here).
- They both get amazingly high on herb extracts.
- They both represent anarchy in its most creative form.
- They both show a general lack of respect for authority.
- You see them only at dinner hour.
- You get looks like "and you are?", "this concerns me how?", "am I under arrest?", "can. I go now?", and "duuuude!" from them at least once a day.
- The idea of movement horrifies them.
- They both tend to collapse in the middle of rooms due to alcohol and/or a warm sunbeam.
- They are both vomit machines.