Why Graduate Students are Like Cats

  1. They are your friends if you feed them.
  2. They talk to you and you can't understand what they are saying.
  3. They tend to run amok in the apartment/house for no apparent reason in short bursts of frenzy, followed by dormancy.
  4. They can survive with a minimum of attention, but do like to be noticed and praised every so often.
  5. They are creatures of the night.
  6. They follow instructions if they feel like it.
  7. They can be soft and cuddly when they feel like it.
  8. Cats barf hairballs, grad students barf highballs (and any other drink they can consume to excess).
  9. Food is very important to them.
  10. Sleep is also very important to them.
  11. Both can sleep or otherwise ignore you while you are talking to them.
  12. Both hide when something big and noisy (vacuum cleaner or supervisor) comes into their vicinity.
  13. They eat some of the most disgusting things (free food).
  14. They can sleep just about anywhere.
  15. They have their own set of morals.
  16. They both like using the computer (cats for warmth).
  17. They both could care less about (insert anything here).
  18. They both get amazingly high on herb extracts.
  19. They both represent anarchy in its most creative form.
  20. They both show a general lack of respect for authority.
  21. You see them only at dinner hour.
  22. You get looks like "and you are?", "this concerns me how?", "am I under arrest?", "can. I go now?", and "duuuude!" from them at least once a day.
  23. The idea of movement horrifies them.
  24. They both tend to collapse in the middle of rooms due to alcohol and/or a warm sunbeam.
  25. They are both vomit machines.