Girlfriend 1.0
Dear Technical Support:
I'm currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I've been having some
problems lately. I've been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 forever as
my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I've tried have always
conflicted with it. I hear that DrinkingBuddies won't crash if GirlFriend is run in
background mode and the sound is turned off. But I'm embarrassed to say I can't find
the switch to turn the sound off. I just run them separately, and it works okay.
Girlfriend also seems to have a problem co-existing with my Golf program, often
trying to abort Golf with some sort of timing incompatibility. I probably should have
stayed with GirlFriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance from
GirlFriend 2.0. After months of conflicts and other problems, I consulted a friend who
has had experience with GirlFriend 2.0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache
to run GirlFriend 2.0, and eventually it would require a Token Ring to run properly. He
was right - as soon as I purged my cache, it uninstalled itself.
Shortly after that, I installed GirlFriend 3.0 beta. All the bugs were supposed to be
gone, but the first time I used it, it gave me a virus anyway. I had to clean out my
whole system and shut down for a while.
I very cautiously upgraded to GirlFriend 4.0. This time I used a SCSI probe first and
also installed a virus protection program. It worked okay for a while until I discovered
that GirlFriend 1.0 was still in my system. I tried running GirlFriend 1..0 again with
GirlFriend 4.0 still installed, but GirlFriend 4.0 has a feature I didn't know about that
automatically senses the presence of any other version of GirlFriend and
communicates with it in some way, which results in the immediate removal of both
versions.
The version I have now works pretty well, but there are still some problems. Like all
versions of GirlFriend, it is written in some obscure language I can't understand, much
less reprogram. Frankly I think there is too much attention paid to the look and feel
rather than the desired functionality. Also, to get the best connections with your
hardware, you usually have to use gold-plated contacts.
And I've never liked how GirlFriend is totally "object-oriented." A year ago, a friend
of mine upgraded his version of GirlFriend to GirlFriendPlus 1.0, which is a Terminate
and Stay Resident version of GirlFriend. He discovered that GirlFriendPlus 1.0 expires
within a year if you don't upgrade to Fiancee 1.0. So he did, but soon after that, he
had to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a huge resource hog. It has taken
up all his space, so he can't load anything else.
One of the primary reasons he decided to go with Wife 1.0 was because it came
bundled with FreeSexPlus. Well, it turns out the resource allocation module of Wife
1.0 sometimes prohibits access to FreeSexPlus, particularly the new Plug-Ins he
wanted to try. On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system
before he can do anything. Although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with
MotherInLaw which has an automatic pop-up feature he can't turn off.
I told him to try installing Mistress 1.0, but he said he heard if you try to run it
without first uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing
the uninstall itself. Then Mistress.
1.0 won't install anyway because of insufficient resources.