Top 10 Reasons Why Not To Invite Great Uncle Edgar to The Family's Christmas Dinner
  1. Tired of the floaties in the eggnog
  2. Kids play hide Uncle Edgars hearing aid
  3. Prosthetic penis keeps going off at the table
  4. Always does the "dentures biting Aunt Sue on the butt" trick
  5. Drools in the gravy
  6. He always seems to forget his gas pills
  7. Can't let him get too close to the microwave, or else he'll have a heart attack
  8. When he gets drunk he likes to make snow angels,"naked"
  9. The dog always pees on his leg when he's sleeping
  10. Every thirty minutes, he forgets who he is and starts running around the table barking and yodeling