What's In The Name Of Baptist Churches...
First Baptist
It has been there too long.
Second Baptist
The people didn't like First Baptist.
Third Baptist
The people didn't like First and Second Baptist.
Ana-Baptist
The people didn't like First, Second, Third, Fourth, ... Baptist, and didn't want to call themselves nth Baptist because they want to be the first on the list alphabetically.
Calvary Baptist
The people crucify their pastor regularly.
Community Baptist
It is a social community club.
Conservative Baptist
The people don't talk to strangers.
Cooperative Baptist
They compromise with anybody and anything.
Free Will Baptist
They draft will for everybody for free, but the church must be the primary beneficiary.
Fundamental Baptist
Fund a mental Baptist.
Grace Baptist
They say grace at every meal, no exceptions, not even one, and don't you forget it!
Immanuel Baptist
They are in manual mode ... church leaders must push them to serve.
Independent Baptist
The people don't depend on God.
Memorial Baptist
It is dead.
Monument Baptist
It is history.
Missionary Baptist
They send out missionaries who are sick and tired of fellowshipping with people who don't do anything.
Open Door Baptist
They lock the doors after Sunday morning services.
Pentecostal Baptist
It is for people who work for the Pentagon.
Primitive Baptist
They don't divide or multiply among themselves.
Progressive National Baptist
They are members of NASCAR (National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing).
Seventh Day Baptist
The other six days are for party.
Southern Baptist
The people hate cold weather.
Third World Baptist
The people love the world so much they don't mind to come in third.
Tabernacle Baptist
Hmmm ... it doesn't look much like a tent.
United Baptist
The people are union members.